my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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