that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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