My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize