I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
