How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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