i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
