i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
