yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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