She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize
