Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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