oh god the rape fog is back!
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
