ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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