She's JV to your varsity
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize