tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
