it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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