You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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