I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
i believe in u and ur pee
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
