I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
