Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
