Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
