no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
