go do what you do best...puke behind churches
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
