bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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