go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
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