We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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