i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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