is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
