worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
