Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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