I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
