And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
