That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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