i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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