i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
