Me. At least after what I've been through.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
