Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
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