Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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