Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
