Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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