i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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