dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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