Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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