That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
is wine microwaveable?
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
