I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
