it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
