So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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