i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
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