NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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