You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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