that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
