i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
