Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Duck Duck Cougar?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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